The Boston Marathon. What’s your drink of choice?

Well, it beats the beer shits.

The Boston Drinkathon is underway and many seasoned drinkers, having trained for months, are already halfway through their pub crawl to Copley Square. I like how there’s only 27,000 runners registered for the marathon, but there’s literally 800,000 people in downtown Boston getting shit-faced right now. Really shows you what our New England priorities are.  I actually decided to pace myself this year and have opted for a more runner-friendly drink like Grey Goose & Gatorade.

Sadly, this year’s insane 90 degree heat is already taking a toll on the runners. I’m just sitting here taking shooters and I’m already sweating in weird places. My wenis has never been so chaffed and irritated from overexertion before. Lifting all these drinks up to my face is super grueling work on my elbow.

Runners: Keep up the good work!

Drinkers: Stay hydrated.

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