This Week …In LA

Getting ready to leave LA now and I couldn’t be more excited about returning to Boston. These bitches wore me out. I had quite the amazing & action-packed weekend. I wish I could have filled ya’ll in more on my sexcapades (I wish!), but daddy was busy drinking. And nobody comes between me and my Beefeater.

LA was its usual self: covered in soot and dirty tampons resting on its sidewalks (see the photo gallery). Which translates to me being overly anxious to head East, take a nice cleansing bubble bath, and get back to reality.

Highlights from the weekend include:

  • Brokechella music fest with some besties. Thanks for a great time James (LADoucheBag) and Erin (La Rosa)!
  • Getting caught in a giant spidersweb (see photo gallery), anxiously awaiting a predator at the Eagle. (The Eagle – every city has one. It’s that super sketchy/last ditch/desperate gay bar you go to at the end of the night for attention. It’s usually full of leather daddies and it’s always called “The Eagle.”)
  • Smelling methane at the La Brea Tar Pits.
  • Eating giant, juicy sausages at Wurstküche (the most delicious place ever!). The word translates to “sausage kitchen,” but ironically sounds like “worst kootchie,” or what I also like to refer to as “bad beaver.” Even funnier, the delish dessert place directly across the street is called The Pie Hole (where I enjoyed a spicy Mexican Chocolate Pie)!
  • Participating in an informational brunch and tour of the Church of Mythology Celebrity Center. As it was a terrifying, terrifying place, reminding me of The Capitol in Panem (cameras and riches EVERYWHERE), I just made up the name “Church of Mythology” whereas to not attract attention to myself for visiting… I swear they’re now following me… But if you switch the word “myth” for “science” and think of Tom Cruise then you may know what I’m talking about. There are two words that I will use to describe this compound: crazy and cult. You can research the rest on your own.
  • CELEBRITY SIGHTINGS for the weekend!
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