Tanorexic. Party of 1.

Okay, I’ll admit that I’m all about having a healthy bronze glow. After all, I am a STAR and I love basking in the limelight (cue Miley Cyrus “Party in the USA” and video montage of me riding a beachcruiser in front of the Santa Monica pier). Oh, where was I? Oh right – so I just stumbled upon 40 photos of the creepiest, tannest woman I’ve ever seen. Seriously, if there are small children nearby, shield their eyes! Oh wait, there are small children nearby as she allegedly brought her fair-skinned 5 year old tanning with her. Allegedly.

Snooki doesn’t hold a candle to this crazy bitch! Eww! Wear your SPF kiddies! So dangerous.

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